Climbing Out of the Depression Hole
- Jason Henry-Ruhl
- Jan 13
- 8 min read

1. Introduction: What Is the "Depression Hole"?
If you’ve never experienced depression, it’s hard to explain what it feels like to be stuck in the "hole." It’s not just sadness. It’s a crushing emptiness, an overwhelming fog, and a paralyzing hopelessness. For many, it feels like being buried alive, screaming for help but unable to make a sound.
This blog isn’t about sugarcoating the experience. It’s about facing the gritty reality of depression while finding tangible, faith-centered ways to climb out. We’ll explore raw truths, practical steps, and spiritual tools to help you navigate this difficult journey. The depression hole may feel endless, but it isn’t. There is a way out, even if it’s not an easy one.
2. The Reality of Rock Bottom

Signs You’re in a Depression Hole:
Loss of interest in things you used to love.
Physical exhaustion that no amount of sleep can fix.
Feeling worthless, hopeless, or like a burden.
Thoughts of escape or harm.
An inability to envision any future that doesn’t hurt.
Why It Feels Impossible to Get Out
Depression thrives on isolation and silence. It whispers lies like, "No one cares," or, "You’re too far gone." These lies create a vicious cycle: the more you believe them, the deeper you sink.
The Emotional Weight of Rock Bottom
Being at rock bottom feels like carrying an invisible weight. Every task, even brushing your teeth, feels monumental. Acknowledge this reality without shame—it’s a symptom, not a failure.
Learning to Accept Rock Bottom as a Starting Point
Sometimes, accepting that you’re at rock bottom can be the first step toward healing. It’s not about giving up but about being honest with yourself. From this place of truth, you can begin the slow and steady work of climbing out.
3. Breaking Through the Lies Depression Tells You

Common Lies and How to Combat Them
The first step to climbing out is recognizing the lies. Depression tells you:
"You’re alone." (Truth: People care more than you think.)
"You’ll never get better." (Truth: Healing takes time, but it’s possible.)
"You’re a burden." (Truth: Your struggles don’t diminish your worth.)
"You don’t deserve happiness." (Truth: Everyone deserves joy and healing.)
The Role of Self-Compassion in Healing
Self-compassion is crucial. Instead of beating yourself up for how you feel, speak to yourself as you would to a dear friend. Say, "It’s okay to struggle. You’re doing your best."
Recognizing Your Own Strengths Despite the Darkness
Even in the depths of depression, you’ve survived every bad day so far. That’s a strength. Identify small ways you’ve shown resilience—even if it’s something as simple as getting out of bed or feeding yourself.
4. Finding Your First Foothold: Small Steps to Start Climbing
The Power of Tiny, Meaningful Actions
When everything feels overwhelming, the idea of getting better seems impossible. But healing begins with the smallest actions:
Get out of bed and move to the couch.
Drink a glass of water.
Text a friend, even if it’s just one word.
Small actions snowball into bigger changes over time. Every small step matters because it builds momentum, even if it doesn’t feel significant at first.
Breaking the Cycle of Isolation
Depression isolates. Push against that tendency by connecting with someone you trust. You don’t have to explain everything; sometimes, just sitting in silence with someone is enough.
Building Momentum with Small Wins
Each small victory matters. Celebrate progress, no matter how insignificant it may seem. These moments build momentum, creating a foundation for larger strides forward.
Shifting Your Focus from Survival to Recovery
In the depression hole, survival often feels like the only goal. But as you begin to climb, shift your focus toward recovery. Recovery isn’t just about surviving—it’s about finding hope, joy, and meaning again.
5. Mental Health and Faith: Letting God into the Pit
Why "Just Pray About It" Isn’t Enough
One of the most damaging things you can hear while depressed is, "Just pray harder." While prayer is essential, depression often requires a combination of spiritual and practical solutions. Faith isn’t about ignoring the reality of mental health; it’s about inviting God into the process.
Biblical Encouragement for the Brokenhearted
Psalm 34:18: "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
Isaiah 41:10: "Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God."
Matthew 11:28-30: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
Practical Ways to Incorporate Faith into Healing
Meditate on Scripture that speaks to God’s love.
Pray honestly, sharing your pain and fears with God.
Listen to worship music that uplifts your spirit.
Join a faith-based support group to connect with others who understand.
Leaning on God’s Promises for Long-Term Strength
God’s promises remind us that no matter how deep the pit feels, He is there with us. Hold onto these truths as you navigate the slow journey of healing.
6. Practical Steps for Rebuilding
Physical Health and Its Role in Mental Health
Your physical health impacts your mental health. Start small by incorporating healthy habits into your routine:
Go for a 5-minute walk, even if it’s just around the house.
Drink water instead of sugary drinks.
Eat one piece of fruit or a vegetable daily to improve your nutrition.
Each step, no matter how minor, contributes to your overall well-being. Physical activity can release endorphins that lift your mood, while proper nutrition fuels your body for the climb ahead.
Creating a Routine When You Have No Energy
Routine provides structure when depression makes life feel chaotic. Start with small, manageable habits:
Set a consistent wake-up time, even if you don’t get out of bed right away.
Establish a simple morning ritual like brushing your teeth or making your bed.
Plan one achievable goal for the day, like folding laundry or writing in a journal.
Over time, these small actions can grow into a sustainable routine that helps you regain a sense of control.
Mindfulness Practices to Ground Yourself
Mindfulness can anchor you in the present moment and reduce feelings of overwhelm. Consider these simple techniques:
Deep breathing: Inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts.
Body scans: Focus on relaxing each part of your body, starting from your toes and moving upward.
Gratitude journaling: Write down one thing you’re grateful for each day.
These practices don’t have to be perfect. The goal is to create moments of calm in the midst of the storm.
Setting Realistic Goals to Move Forward
When you’re climbing out of a depression hole, it’s essential to set goals that are realistic and achievable. Break large tasks into smaller steps:
Instead of "clean the house," aim to "tidy one corner of a room."
Replace "exercise daily" with "stretch for 5 minutes."
Swap "fix my life" for "focus on one positive change this week."
Progress, no matter how small, is still progress. Celebrate each step forward as a victory.
7. Finding and Using Your Support System
Who to Turn to When You Feel Alone:
Trusted friends or family.
Faith leaders or mentors.
Online communities focused on mental health and faith.
Navigating Relationships While Struggling
Depression can strain relationships, but honesty and communication can make a difference. Share your struggles with those you trust and let them know how they can support you. Be specific—whether it’s checking in regularly or helping with practical tasks.
Building a Circle of Encouragement
Surround yourself with people who uplift you. These might not always be the people you’ve relied on before, and that’s okay. Seek out friendships and connections that encourage growth, healing, and positivity.
Asking for Help Without Guilt or Shame
It’s okay to need help. Asking for assistance doesn’t make you weak—it makes you human. Whether it’s emotional support or practical help, recognize that reaching out is a sign of strength.
8. When Professional Help Is Necessary

Destigmatizing Therapy and Medication
Therapy and medication are tools, not crutches. Seeking professional help doesn’t mean you lack faith—it means you’re taking an active role in your healing. Just as you’d see a doctor for a physical illness, it’s wise to seek mental health support when needed.
Knowing When It’s Time to Seek Outside Help
You’ve been struggling for an extended period without improvement.
You’re experiencing thoughts of self-harm or suicide.
Your depression interferes with daily functioning, such as work, school, or relationships.
Choosing the Right Professional for You
Research therapists or counselors who align with your faith and values. Don’t be afraid to try a few before finding the right fit.
How to Get the Most Out of Therapy Sessions
Be open and honest with your therapist. Therapy is most effective when you’re willing to share your thoughts and feelings, even when it’s uncomfortable. Set goals for what you want to achieve and revisit them regularly.
9. Relapse Happens: How to Handle Setbacks
Why Relapse Is Part of Recovery
Recovery isn’t a straight line. There will be good days and bad days. Setbacks don’t erase your progress; they’re part of the process.
Strategies to Bounce Back Quickly
Remind yourself that setbacks are normal.
Revisit the small actions that helped before.
Lean on your support system and your faith.
Rebuilding Confidence After a Setback
Each time you recover from a setback, you build resilience. Remind yourself of the progress you’ve made and focus on the tools you’ve developed to move forward.
Using Setbacks as Opportunities for Growth
Setbacks can teach you valuable lessons about your needs and limits. Use them as opportunities to refine your strategies and strengthen your foundation for long-term recovery.
10. Holding Onto Hope: A Light at the End of the Tunnel

Climbing out of a depression hole is one of the hardest things you’ll ever do, but it’s worth it. Healing is a journey, not a destination. Every small step you take is a victory. Keep moving forward, even when it feels impossible.
Celebrating Progress, No Matter How Small
Acknowledge your victories, no matter how minor they may seem. Whether it’s getting out of bed or completing a task, celebrate each step forward as a sign of growth.
Looking Ahead to a Brighter Future
Visualize a future where you feel more whole and at peace. Even if it feels distant, keep that vision as a source of motivation to keep going.
Encouragement for the Journey
Remember, healing takes time, but every effort you make is worth it. You’re not alone in this journey. God walks with you through every step, every setback, and every triumph.
Sharing Your Story to Help Others
Your story has power. As you heal, consider sharing your journey to inspire and encourage others. Your experiences could be the light someone else needs to start their climb out of the darkness.
Bonus: Functioning with Depression When You Have Kids

Parenting while battling depression is one of the hardest challenges you can face. Here are some practical tips to help you manage:
Be Honest (in an Age-Appropriate Way): Let your kids know you’re having a hard time, but emphasize that it’s not their fault. Simple phrases like, "Mom/Dad feels tired today, but I still love you," can provide reassurance.
Prioritize Basic Needs: Focus on the essentials—making sure your kids are fed, safe, and loved. It’s okay if the house isn’t spotless or routines are simpler than usual.
Ask for Help: Reach out to trusted friends or family for assistance. Whether it’s babysitting or bringing over a meal, people often want to help—they just need to know how.
Include Your Kids in Small Tasks: Turning chores or self-care into bonding activities can help. For example, "Let’s fold the laundry together" or "Let’s go for a short walk."
Give Yourself Grace: Remember, being a good parent doesn’t mean being perfect. Showing your kids that you’re trying, even on tough days, teaches them resilience and empathy.



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